Will I ever stop?
Oh, how I fool myself-
endlessly caught up in the game of seeking, clinging, grasping,
for certainty, proof, knowledge
so that I can
stand on solid ground, be okay, a somebody, feel safe
so that I don’t have to
feel uncomfortable, feel sad, alone,
admit to my fears, my vulnerability, my humanity
and yet,
pushing away my fears, vulnerability, humanity
just increases my desperation, isolation, separation
and when I’m honest and
admit to my fears, vulnerability, humanity
when I say I’m often scared, lonely, angry, judgemental, worried that there’s something fundamentally wrong about me
when I let myself feel this fully,
then something dissolves, relaxes, softens inside of me
I touch into a depth unknown, yet my deepest home,
I’m held in the tenderest embrace whilst I swirl through unknown lands
all knowing falls away and simply my essence remains
so why, oh why do I keep on forgetting this over and over again?
oh why, oh why do I once again begin my cycle of seeking, clinging and grasping?
Will I ever stop?
Art: Girl in Tree ~ Susan Boulet
Samina! Wow! Beautiful resonates with me. So courageous of you to share. Thankyou.x
LOVE ♡♡♡♥♥